Saturday, September 19, 2009

I'm Happy My Procrastinating Skills Are Following Me to Grad School

Well hello friends. I know it's been a while. Not gonna lie, I just re-read my previous post from, oh, over a month ago, and chuckled. I'm a witty little gal sometimes.

The reason I haven't written in a while is due to a few foreseen obstacles, which I shall name and explain in further detail.

1) I started graduate school. Clearly I have work to do now that I'm all about using my brain again. It's weird that when I wake up I have to take an Aleve for my headaches. My brain will get used to this change soon I hope. Honestly I love school and my new friends. I'm taking three classes, two of which are so incredible that I get excited to work on projects and go to class to discuss interesting topics. The third one kind of sucks but at least the projects are cool. I ALMOST feel smart again. Having a bunch of second years in my classes keeps me grounded. Oh and I'm incredibly inarticulate and they all sound smart. You know what I mean? I know I'm smart, but I don't SOUND it. It's annoying. I bought this book one time called "100 Words That Will Make You Sound Smart." Maybe I should crack that sucka open every once in a while. I feel like it will take me far.

2) Okay there really isn't a #2. I just feel better when I number things.

Honestly I haven't thought about anything to write in a while. I'm actually working on my academic online portfolio (aka academic blog) which means I can't say things like, "I'm a witty little gal sometimes."

Okay, so what should I write about? How the stereotypes at my school are fairly accurate? How I try to fit in sometimes and look like a preppy jerk? How when I get sick of trying to fit in I just wear workout clothes to class? How I go to the gym to see the eye candy, willing those boys playing shirts & skins basketball to be 24 or older? How the smoker next to me (I'm sitting outside Starbucks right now because it's a gorgeous day) needs to move away from me and perhaps apologize for endangering my lovely lungs? Nah. I'll talk about a recent experience and relate it to the world. That sounds good. Great topic. Going global.

Alright, so I'm unemployed. I love it. Or do I just love living off student loans? It's a toss-up. Anywho, I decided to go for a nice bike ride one pretty morning this week. I figured I'd go around 9 because most people would be at work by then. I was wrong, but whatever. The path to the Potomac was lovely anyway. Seriously, I know it's gross and I would NEVER do the Nations Triathlon because I want to bear children in the (very very VERY distant) future...BUT the Potomac River is quite pretty from a distance. And, on such a sunny, breezy, 65 degree morning it was rather tranquil. Until I popped a tire. Aaaaaand all zen moments were gone. Imagine any and all remarks flying out of my mouth as I slowed to a wobbly stop. Admittedly I should have learned how to change a tire. I was miles away from home and far from a bus stop. At least I had money with me. Honestly I never bring my wallet on rides, but thank goodness I did. I also had a tube and tools to change my tire and OH MY GOSH MOVE AWAY FROM ME SMOKER! DID YOU JUST EXHALE IN MY GENERAL DIRECTION?!?!?! TAKE YOUR PLATO BOOK AND YOUR CANCER STICKS ELSEWHERE!!!!!!

Where was I? Oh right. So as I'm about to start crying, a Good Samaritan (GS) passed me. He asked if I needed help and I graciously accepted his offer. He changed my tire. A police officer even stopped to make sure things were cool. Which they were. Zen moments were returning as I basked in the glow of their hearts of gold.

Unfortunately the yuppie bike shop which sold me my tube and my emergency pump sold me a tube and a pump which are incompatible. So I was back to square 1 because my GS didn't have a pump on him. At least he changed my tire.

So there I was, drenched in sweat, with a bike and one working tire. After hailing about 27 cabs to no avail, I said a quick prayer before I crossed busy traffic (barely living to tell the tale) and did something I hate doing: WALKED MY BIKE. It's just wrong. I walked it roughly a mile or so, through the Mall where I warmly welcomed tourists to our nation's capital (read: I looked at them scornfully when they got in my way), then close to my bus route. Then, out of nowhere I see a giant GMC taxi. Someone got out of it, and I was a GS for helping said person inside, and the cabbie took me home!!!! Yippee!!!!!

Needless to say, I learned a few things from this experience:
1) Bring money with you when you ride your bike
2) Don't go to a trendy bike shop. They will sell you overpriced crap that don't work together in cases of an emergency. Which is was what I was in.
3) Bring a cell phone so you call a cab instead of walking through tourists
4) Be a GS. Karma is awesome.
5) Numbering is an effective way to communicate a message. :)

Okay, so going global on this: be a GS. There needs to be more people like the one I met on the bike path. What would I have done without him and his knowledge about changing tires? I probably would've cried, attempted to do it myself, and broke my entire bike. Be a GS and save someone.